Three Sheets to the Wind

Davor Log - Entry 3

Jokes am funny

Davor go back and read previous Davor log. Davor know man-book on man-writing make Davor words look bad. Davor am now use only good words in man-tongue. Good words am action words. Other tenses am dumb and bored. Okay? Okay.

Davor forget what date now, but still same year, and winter time. Maybe Davor birthday soon.

First Davor and G and E and O all sail to lucky rock place and G get married in big grog party. Davor have good time. Well, Davor think have good time. Davor so drunk Davor not remember. G say Davor turn into demon and eat lucky rock fighters, but, G probably not am truthful. Anyway, then Davor and others all sail to map where treasure from other pirate am hid.

Davor am speared dragon! Davor so strong that dragon panic and fly away to mom. It obvious because when it fly it call for mom. Davor laugh at puny dragon, ha ha. But then G say leave before mom come back. That why G captain.

Oh, Davor almost forget about magic pool make hurts gone. Meet other woman who jump off cliff, and then other big dragon fly away. Davor figure out that woman am dragon too, but not tell G or E or O because Davor keep that to self.

Uh, Davor still have page left so maybe tell joke he been work on.

An elf a dwarf and a orc walk into a pub. Elf walks up orders wine. Everyone laugh at stupid elf. Ha ha ha!

Knock knock? Who there? Davor! Davor who? DAVOR KNOCK YOU ON FACE.

A dwarf an elf and a Davor walk into a bar. The dwarf order ale and the elf order applesauce. Davor order butter and have roast dwarf with apple-elf. Ha ha ha!

Okay, Davor hear few other good ones. Try to write down so remember for grog-meal.

How many Paladins does it take to light a torch?
One to strike the flint, and another to “uphold the light.”

Davor not sure why funny, but everyone laugh, so Davor try to remember. The rest funniest.

Why do elves have pointy ears?
There have to be some point to elves.

How many elves does it take to sharpen a sword?
Three. One to sharpen the sword and two to write a song about it so that when the first elf is done, four hundred years later, they’ll remember whose sword it was.

Why do the elves not grow facial hair?
What? and not be mistaken for a lovely woman?

How many Half-elves does it take to light a candle?
Surprisingly only 1. It turns out that half-elves are good for something after all.

How many Elves does it take to light a candle?
Three. One to sing, one to dance, one to summon the spiritual guardian of joyous flame forth into the realm material.


ianmacdonald jithrae

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